Hmm Progression

The Hmm Beginning

It's been a slow transition from "Do you want me to make the phone call?" to the quiet sounding board of simply listening. One of the primary traps was a situation involving the bank. Contacting the realtor was another frequent situation: "He doesn't respond to me. Could you call?" I didn't always keep quiet, especially with the realtor. I did learn to say "Hmm" regarding the bank and utilities. It felt good, not in a snarky way but in a calm acknowledgment that I didn't allow myself to be manipulated.

Son #1 has lessened the times he seeks an answer and clarified that a phone call is for venting purposes, not asking for a solution. He's either evolving or has concluded that I don't offer good opinions. I choose to believe he's expressing his opinion. I can be a sounding board.

Son #2 evolved long ago - he doesn't require work. I need to let go of my need to be the problem solver. I've enabled the codependent relationship for far too long.

I will check back in over the next two weeks. If the situation presents itself, I will share my hmm triumphs.